I Would Have

I would have pulled Joseph out. Out of that pit. Out of that prison. Out of that pain. But I would have cheated nations out of the man God would use to deliver them from famine.

I would have pulled David out. Out of Saul’s spear-throwing presence. Out of the caves he hid away in. Out of the pain of rejection. But I would have cheated Israel out of a God-hearted king.

I would have pulled Esther out. Out of being snatched from her only family. Out of being placed in a position she never asked for. Out of the path of a vicious, power-hungry foe. But I would have cheated a people out of the woman God would use to save their very lives.

I would have pulled Jesus off. Off of the cross. Off of the road that led to suffering and pain. Off of the path that would mean nakedness and beatings, nails and thorns. But I would have cheated the entire world out of a Savior. Out of salvation. Out of an eternity filled with no more suffering and no more pain.

I want to pull myself out. I want to change my path. I want to stop my pain. But right now I know I would be wrong. I would be out of line. I would be cheating myself and cheating the world out of so much good.

Because God knows. He knows the good this pain will produce. He knows the beauty this hardship will grow. He’s watching over me and keeping me even in the midst of this. He promised me that I can trust Him. Even when it all feels like more than I can bear.

–Kimberly Henderson